Peace In The End

It’s been a while since my last posting… end of last year was pretty hectic and the beginning of this new year was just as hectic.  But now that the EM retreat concluded and I have a little time to sit down and write, I thought it would be good to share about some of my experiences from past several weeks.  The GOP Presidential Nominating process is very interesting, to say the least.  I will have a blog on this topic in the near future (hehe).  An Italian cruise ship tipped over with the Captain of the ship abandoning long before all the passengers were safe.  The exchange between the Italian Coast Guard and the captain is a must-hear conversation.

Also, a legendary football coach, Joe Paterno, passed away yesterday morning.  I got back from the retreat and saw the news on CNN… it was shocking to hear that he passed away when all reports indicated that he was doing very well in his fight against lung cancer.  He was 85 years old and recently fired as the head coach of Penn State football, where he dedicated his life for the past 60 years.  I read an article where one of his former players, Matt Millen, stated that he passed away from a “Broken Heart.”  He is alluding to the scandal of the former assistant coach of Paterno, who is accused of sexually molesting young children, where Joe Paterno did not “DO” enough to protect the children and alert the authority, which would have led to the arrest of his good friend and assistant coach.  While I cannot make any judgments about the case, I was struck by the comment from Matt Millen that his old coach probably died from a “Broken Heart”, due to all the agony and suffering that he faced because of his association to the sexual scandal.  Six decades of doing the right thing and yet, according to Matt Millen, his old coach passed away without peace due to a circumstance that he COULD have controlled, yet failed to do.  This made me think about two things: One… no matter how hard we try, we will never be able to experience peace through our own means.  Two… Praise God that peace, despite all the surrounding circumstances, can be experienced through faith in Christ.

Several weeks ago, I received news that our EM Hosanna Choir conductor’s father’s health was deteriorating rapidly.  I was able to speak to her before she got on the plane to Virginia.  She was obviously in a lot of pain and I could hear the sadness in her voice.  I tried to comfort her and promised that the church would be praying for her father.  As I prayed for her father, my prayer was that if it’s God’s will, to restore his health, but if not, then allow him to possess complete peace as he leaves earth and enters Heaven.  Last week, my wife and I visited our conductor’s home and spent some time with her and her husband.  As I listened to her speak, I could not hide my joy in hearing that her father had passed away with peace in his heart and knowing this to be true, it brought a lot of comfort and encouragement to her family members.  Despite suffering from physical difficulties for a decade, her father was able to leave this earth, not with a “broken heart”, but with a peaceful heart, knowing that he was entering Heaven, where there is no more tears and no more pain.  Peace cannot be experienced through our own means nor can it be the result of human achievements, no matter how awesome those achievements may be.  If human achievements led to peace, then Joe Paterno, who has won more games as a college coach than anyone else in the history of college football, would have passed away with joy and peace and someone like Matt Millen, who knew Joe Paterno very well, would never utter that his old coach passed away from a “broken heart.”

My prayer for my parents and also for my in-laws is that they would experience peace when it is their time to leave earth and enter Heaven.  All of God’s children should experience peace in their hearts as they say good-bye to earthly life, but we know this is not always the case.  Some people foolishly pursue joy and peace from this world and never really experience it.  The Scripture reminds us in Philippians 4:7 – “And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”  And Jesus says in John 14:27 – “Peace I leave with you; My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Do not let your heart be troubled, nor let it be fearful.”  True peace can only come from my faith in Jesus Christ.

Testimony & Tebow

Today was the Third Advent Sunday and I had asked, a few weeks back, a member of my congregation, Jackie Yoon, to share a testimony about her son, Jonathan’s journey through the brain surgery to remove a tumor.  I have shared about Jonathan’s battle with brain tumor in my earlier post.  Today, Sunday, December 11th, Jonathan and Jackie gave wonderful, encouraging and inspiring testimonies.  Jonathan talked about keeping his faith during the whole process and Jackie shared about surrendering ownership of Jonathan to God in Heaven, which led to formation of peace and comfort in her heart.  She surrendered Jonathan to God and asked for His love and mercy to bring healing and restoration to Jonathan’s physical health.  I wish we had recorded the two testimonies from Jonathan and Jackie because they were really incredible and both of them spent a lot of time in preparation for sharing their testimonies.

Listening to Jackie share about a parent’s view… a mother’s take on the whole situation truly brought tears to my eyes and I had to try everything to prevent tears from flowing out because I had to preach my message soon.  Well, I was successful in keeping my tears from flowing, but the flood-gates soon opened wide when we were singing Jonathan’s favorite praise song “I will rise” after his testimony.  It’s not just the song… the words and the music, but it was the sight of seeing Jonathan play the drums for the praise song with such passion and zeal.  I am usually on the other side of the sanctuary, but for some reason, today I was standing next to the drums and had a front row seat to experience Jonathan’s incredible gift of music, that was only exceeded today by his wonderful testimony of God’s grace and love.  Singing the praise song… listening to other children of God singing the same song… and watching Jonathan use his musical talent to praise the Lord formed the perfect trifecta that chocked me up and tears began to freely flow.  As the song wrapped up I had to do my best to wipe away the tears because I was going up to the pulpit to preach the message.  Throughout the message, I still had traces of tears in my eyes… I hope it was not visible by the congregation.  I preached about peace in this Advent Season and it was very much analogous to Jackie’s testimony of finding peace and comfort in the midst of her most difficult situation up to date.  I truly believe that many worshippers were blessed through today’s testimonies and I hope they were also challenged to turn their life focus to Jesus Christ.

On a lighter note, let me share an image that brought great joy in my heart today…

Came home from church and saw that the Broncos were losing 10-0 to the Bears with only about 3 minutes to play… it was TEBOW time!!!  Tebow led a drive for a touchdown, but the Bears had the ball and they just needed to run out the clock.  But the Bears running back inexplicably ran out of bounds, causing the game clock to stop.  Had he stayed in-bounds, the clock would have kept running and the Broncos were without any timeouts.  Then the broncos got the ball back and Tebow led the Broncos down again and they had enough time for a 59 yard field goal attempt, which is not easy at all.  The kicker nailed it… perhaps the Angels of God gently guided the ball through the uprights

The score was tied and I can just hear the American Pagan Society (hehe) complaining about possible “Tebowing” scene on the sideline and trepidation about another awesome comeback by the “Faithful Quarterback.”  It was onto the overtime and the Bears had the ball… then the unbelievable… perhaps even miraculous, event took place.  The running back fumbled the ball and the Broncos recovered the ball and Tebow was leading the team down the field again, leading to the game winning 51 yard field goal… again, not an easy kick considering the amount of pressure related to the kick.  The game was not on TV, but I was checking the score on my iPhone and when the scoreboard changed from 10-10 to 10-13 in favor of the Broncos, I let out a big YEEEEEESSSSS with both of my arms raised high.  How can this guy continue to pull out games like this time after time… even the veteran NFL analysts are lost for words.  It just bought a huge smile to see a fellow believer do something awesome in promoting the gospel of Jesus Christ.

This day began with tears of joy as I listened and watched a child of God give his best to the Lord, and then ended with laughter of joy through another miraculous comeback by the “Faithful Quarterback”.  What a day!!!

Despair & Despondence… Lifelong Foes

End of year is always hectic and crazy for all people. Working people in the professional arena of our society have deadlines to meet, whether it’s projects or work-related events. People in the academia have papers and exams to complete and hope for the best results to come forth. Stay-at-home moms, and in some cases dads, also have so much work to finish around the house, they sometimes fantasize about getting away to a remote and desolate island where they could get away from all of life’s struggles and burdens. Come to think of it, it’s not just stay-at-home moms & dads, but all of us feel this desire to completely disconnect ourselves from the business of life.

End of the year should bring a sense of excitement as we reflect back on the past year and look forward to an exciting new year. But in this age and time of economic downturn, social upheaval, political divisions and spiritual indifferences, more and more people are identified by two things that seem to go hand-in-hand… despair & despondence. Believe me when I say it does not take a whole lot for people to lose hope and be overcome with feelings of despair & despondence. As a believer of Jesus Christ, I am constantly in battle with these two life-long foes as my faith in the Lord will be tested over and over again. It’s hard enough when the source of despair & despondence come from the world, which we consider to be dark and sin-infested, but the level of spiritual difficulty and the intensity of the spiritual battle seem to hit a higher chord when fellow believers start casting stones of criticism and personal opinions as if it’s the “TRUTH.” What’s even more heart-wrenching and at times even upsetting is that these so called “Opinions of Truth” never come from the horse’s mouth, but take a longer detour through other people.

James 3:1~12 talks about how powerful our tongues can be… when I say powerful, I mean it can have powerful effects in relation to both spectrums of positive and negative outcomes. In ministry, I have two outlets to express my feelings of despair & despondence… One is my wife, Minah. I love my wife and I am truly thankful for her in my life. I do not always show it, but I am truly thankful for her. Great as Minah’s patience may be, even she has limits and sometimes my out-pouring of frustration from despair & despondence, mostly related to ministry affairs, are not always embraced with warm and gentle embraces. I don’t blame her… I think it would take a perfect person with perfect patience to take in what we dish out in frustration. This leads me to my second outlet… and yes you have guessed correct… there is a perfect person with perfect patience… our Lord, Jesus Christ. I could yell, scream, cry and complain all to my hearts desire and the Lord’s response is always the same… I love you Mark. The convictions of God’s response to my cries of despair and despondence always move me to tears and bring spirit’s work of sanctification. When I am able to spiritually reconnect with the Lord and not be controlled by works of Satan and it’s tools of despair & despondence, I begin to lift up prayers for those that have cast the stones toward me. Invariably, Stephen always comes to my mind, one who prayed and sought God’s mercy and forgiveness for those who hurled rocks toward him.

I am reminded that my struggles are very minute in comparison to individuals and families that go through much tougher ordeals and hence their feelings of despair and despondence are even greater than mine. While that may be true, there is only one way to defeat our lifelong foes and that is faith in Jesus Christ. I am encouraged to see faith in action and in more recent times, it is very much encouraging to see God’s faith in action through someone like Tim Tebow. This is a topic for another blog… but in the meantime, I hope and pray that the end of year, despite it’s traps of despair & despondence, will bring forth greater dose of faith in my walk with the Lord.

More Prayer Needed

One of our families in the ministry, Joe & Jackie Yoon, went through some really difficult times as their son, Jonathan, was diagnosed with a brain tumor and he is only a sophomore in high school.  Jonathan spent several weeks in the hospital and endured through a very difficult surgery and he is now on the road to recovery.  Our church prayed steadfastly for Jonathan and the Yoon family and we are all seeing the grace of God manifesting through Jonathan’s wonderful recovery.  As Jonathan’s health makes progressive recovery, perhaps some of us have not prayed for Jonathan as much as we did before… not just regarding Jonathan, maybe our prayer life overall has not been as ardent as it should be.  Many of us were very passionate about prayer when Jonathan needed our prayer, but our spiritual fire is less “caliente” as we observe Jonathan’s marvelous recovery.  This is a spiritual pitfall that we need to avoid.  How many times in our lives have we prayed fervently and then cooled-off because the situations or circumstances in our lives turned for the better.  The “Bat-Call” goes out to our God when we find ourselves in despair and despondence… but our desire to pray slowly decays as our hopelessness and helplessness turns for better, not realizing that such a turn can and will be met with new challenges and temptations from the devil.  Steady and consistent prayer life is needed in all of our lives.

If we needed more motivation to pray as a congregation(such should never be the case when it comes to prayer life, but sometimes we need that spiritual kick-start), we got it when I received the news that one of our deacons and long time member, Glen Berkland, had a heart-attack and will require a “Quintuple” by-pass surgery.  When I first heard the news, it felt like a huge boulder just landed on top of me.  I had just seen Glen a few days before during our Wednesday Night Bible Study and he looked fine.  It turns out he’s had shortness of breath for a while and during a routine physical check-up, the doctors discovered the clogged arteries.  Truly thank God that he suffered a heart-attack at the hospital and not behind the wheel of his car or during his working hours.  Heart-attack itself is never a cause for thanksgiving, but that it happened in the best place for medical treatment… the hospital… is a cause for giving thanks to God.  I visited Glen and his wife, Sue, at the hospital this morning(11/19) and Glen was in good spirits.  Just seeing Glen sitting up and smiling was a wonderful sight to see.

Our congregation has been once again called to prayer and I think we would all agree that more prayer is always needed.  During this week of Thanksgiving, we need to give thanks that Glen is still with us and via by-pass surgery on Monday, he will be with us for much, much, much longer.  God has reminded me that I need more prayer and our congregation needs more prayer.  We are going to cover Glen in prayer and continue to remain in prayer for his full recovery.  There is so much to be thankful for and I pray that Glen and his family will also find causes to give thanks in this season of Thanksgiving.

Accident Happens… Uggghhhh

Yesterday, which is my normal off day after a long and exhausting Sunday, I was running around doing my errands and I was at the local bank.  I had pulled into the parking space and decided that it may be faster to go through the drive-through instead… an unwise decision.  I began to pull out of the space and looked to my right and left, but when I pulled a little bit out, there was a loud bang and I knew right away that I was involved in a car accident.  Did I not look at the rear view mirror???  If I did not, then another unwise decision… I thought I did, but apparently I did not because I never saw that minivan.  It turned out the person driving the minivan had two little children, but she was not the mother… she was the nanny and when she stepped out of her car, she still had her cell phone open in her hand.  Damage to both the minivan and my civic were pretty serious and I was just thankful that I have insurance for situations like this.  For 99.9% of the time I feel as though I am throwing my money into an abyss called GEICO, but during a time like this I am thankful for insurance coverage.

After exchanging information I placed a call to GEICO to report the accident and that is when I found out that I had canceled collision coverage on my civiv not too long ago, in order to save about $250 a year, therefore, I would have to pay for the repair cost of the civic all out-of-pocket… another unwise decision in hopes of saving a couple of hundred dollars… uggghhhhh.  Thankfully I still had liability coverage so the other person’s car was fully covered, but now I had visions of dollar signs all over my head as I stared at the damage to my car.

After getting over the initial shock of the accident, I was able to gather my thoughts and began to think about what I can learn from this accident.  The first thought was “Is God trying to tell me to get a new car?” (hehe)  Wishful thinking, but NO!  God sends gentle, and at times not-so-gentle, reminders to let me know that I need to keep my focus on Him and not on my own self-centered wishes and thoughts.  I have been thinking about several things that have been going through my mind in the last several weeks that places more interest in my personal and family comfort than placing focus on serving and doing the work of God.  This was a reminder to turn my attention to the Lord and not to my own selfish pursuit of comfort and satisfaction.

I learned another wonderful lesson in this accident.  I had canceled the collision coverage so that I could save some money.  $250 dollars is a lot of money, but it comes out to about $20 dollars a month and I had settled for short-term gain but sacrificed the long-term protection and assurance.  So many people, including many Christians, settle for short-term & temporary pleasure rather than seeking and serving the Lord for eternal blessings in Heaven.  Rick Warren mentions in his book “Purpose Driven Life” that too many people are seeking “Instant Gratification”.  He mentions that Christian faith and journey are about “Delayed Gratification,” which means that we may not be able to fully enjoy the blessings of God right now, but when we are in Heaven with our God, we will no longer suffer, nor have pain, whether physical, emotional or spiritual.  In this age of “I want it right now,” too many of us are compromising eternal blessings of God for short-term and temporary pleasures that quickly dissipate into thin air.  I knew about this because I preach about it often, but to live it through my cancellation of GEICO collision coverage, this was another fresh reminder of seeking eternal blessings and not settling for short-term pleasure.

When I took the car to a body shop, the person who gave me the estimate, Jesse (a real nice man), pretty much confirmed what I had feared.  It was going to cost about $2,000 dollars to restore the car.  That is pretty close to the threshold of “Totaling” my car.  He said, “Don’t worry, your insurance will cover most of it.”  Another reminder from a total stranger that I settled for short-term gain… When I told him that I had canceled my collision and just kept the liability, he was very helpful and gave me an alternative solution that could save me some money.  The car will not look as it did before the accident because there will not be brand new parts, but he will try to restore the car by simply trying to fix the parts without using new parts.  I had visions of duck-tape and crazy clue in my head, but Jesse reassured me that it will look “decent.”  The price for this “alternative” solution would be more manageable and I was grateful to Jesse and to my God for this solution.  Jesse could have just said, $2,000 and I would had to choose to go to another body shop, which does not guarantee a lower price, or just pay $2,000 to get it fixed.  But he offered me another way to fix it and save some money in the process.  The Lord always provides for us a way out of our struggles and problems, even though we get ourselves into these predicaments through our sinful hearts.  This is called “GRACE.”  May the grace of our Lord, Jesus Christ, be overflowing in your daily life.

Life is Short

I got a call from my father early this morning and he sounded quite shaken.  An associate pastor from my home church… the church I grew up in, passed away due to a heart-attack in the early hours of this morning.  My father went to the early morning prayer and there was an announcement of the pastor’s passing.  Being the caring, and probably somewhat shaken from the news, father that he is, he called me to encourage me to exercise my body as well as my spirit.  It turns out that the pastor who passed away leaves behind a wife and two teenage daughters.  Such a tragic news and I pray that the family of the deceased pastor will be able to receive comfort, support and encouragement from the church.

Not sure how much time we will all have here on earth.  Sometimes we automatically assume that our eyes will open in the morning and we will get out of bed to tackle the new day.  We take for granted how we are able to breathe in and breathe out each second of each minute.  I did not realize it during my earlier years, but life truly is very short and unpredictable.  What I need to remember and also encourage others to remember is that this life on earth is temporary and it will be followed by a second life that will be eternal in its character.  How, where and with whom I will spend that second eternal life depends on whether I have drank and continuously drink from the living water of eternal life.

Whenever I hear about someone’s passing, especially someone that I have known closely, I cannot help but to think about my parents, in-laws and also about my own mortality.  We all need to prepare to leave this temporary life and embrace the eternal life.  I for one, am looking forward to living my temporary life to the fullest so that I may honor God, despite my flaws and shortcomings, and truly enjoy my time with family and spiritual friends.  Death always seems to carry a negative connotation, but as David reminds us in Psalm 23, we do not have to fear death because it no longer carries any power over us.  Death is just a shadow of it’s former self.  Our Shepherd, Lord Jesus Christ, will guide us through the Valley of the shadow of death.

Remaining Pure and Holy

In today’s QT, the early verses of Psalm 119 brings great reminder to remain pure and holy and the only way I can remain in such spiritual condition is by being obedient to the Word of God.  The teachings of Jesus Christ is not for intellectual gain nor is it for creating spiritual standards to judge and criticize other people.  God has given the Word to me so that I can be pure & holy in His presence as I seek to be empowered by the Holy Spirit.  Too often sin gets the better of me and spiritual purity and holiness get thrown off to the side.  Delighting in the teachings of the Lord is the spiritual goal for all Christians and I am no different.  I hope to experience such spiritual contentment each day I as search the Scripture for guidance and strength.

This past Sunday was a really long day.  I didn’t feel right physically beginning on Saturday night and when I woke up Sunday morning, I could feel that I was coming down with something.  I had the chills and my body didn’t feel right.  Spent the whole day preaching, teaching and then meeting with the Council leaders for about 2 hours.  Then I had some more discussions with servants of our church and I thought I was free to go back home and try to get well.  Then I ran into one of the elders and we began another discussion that probably lasted about an hour.  By the time I got home I knew I was coming down with a cold.  Body ache… sore throat… headache… and back pain.  Minah made my favorite soup so that I can feel better.  There is no name for this soup… there’s meat, a ton of vegetables and she makes it spicy.  I love this soup and I can feel my body feeling the same love and getting better already.

I met our new pastor today and we had a wonderful time of fellowship and meeting.  He seems to be very laid back, but passionate about ministry and serving to glorify God.  I appreciated his philosophy of ministry and his encouragement to the staff to serve with him so that we may honor God and lead the members of our church to spiritual greatness.  Looking forward to serving God with him.

Something New… Starting a Blog

This is my first ever blog… I have been keeping my own private blog, better known as a devotional and meditation entries, which I will continue to write, but I thought this would be a wonderful tool to encourage others, especially my own congregation and others that visit this blog.

I was truly blessed today through my time of devotion, using Our Daily Bread, where the author used Psalm 131 and made the following remark… “David draws a comparison between a weaned child that no longer frets for what it once demanded, and a soul that has learned the same lesson. It is a call to learn humility, patient endurance, and contentment in all my circumstances—whatever they are—though I do not understand God’s reasons.”  This is a very difficult spiritual discipline to harness because we are such self-centered and self-seeking sinners who lack patience to wait for God’s plans to be fulfilled in us.

As I sit in the study cubicle of Eden Prairie library, preparing and trying to put a bow on my Sunday worship sermon, I am reminded that I lack patience and humility, two qualities that are very important for a fruitful Christian life… two qualities that are also very important for me as a pastor.  My prayer is that I can be a faithful Christian on all aspects of my life… as a child of God; as a husband, father, son and brother to my siblings.  This is also my prayer for the congregation that I have been entrusted with through God’s grace.